I had a Stroke

Yesterday was a big two week anniversary for me. It was the anniversary of something life changing and something that has left its mark on me forever. Two weeks ago yesterday at 3:34 PM I had a stroke. Over the course of the next two hours it would be the first of at least two strokes that I would have that day. The tests would come to show that the strokes I had that day were not the first ones that I had. There was some damage that was visible in the MRI which is evidence that there was at least one (possibly more) stroke that left its mark on my brain. To make things more interesting the MRI also showed that I had had strokes on both sides of my brain unlike most people who only usually have them on one side. I have had stroke-like symptoms for the last year and a half--though none of the tests has ever shown that I actually had them. I have had several tests done MRI's, EEG's, CT Scans, EKG's, Echos, Sonograms, Ultrasounds, EMG, TEE, and none of them have been able to tell the doctors what was causing my numbness and loss of muscle strength--that is until now. Though it sucks to have had a stroke, now they know what is wrong with me and they can treat it. I am on blood thinners and most likely will be for the rest of my life, and with that comes the weekly blood tests or $20 finger prick to make sure my blood is thin but not to thin. Out of all of this I am more sure today than I was two weeks ago that God has a plan for my life, because what could have disabled me for the rest of my life has indeed left no lasting damage in my body function or brain processes. To not give Him the glory and praise for such a personal miracle would be just silly. He takes care of those who serve Him.

Note To Self: I Am OK

The more I learn about discipleship the more I love God and who He truly is. Two years ago I was chained to my need to climb the corporate ladder and see more zeroes on my paycheck. When I felt God saying it was time to leave my job--the only job I had had since I was 19--I admittedly started panicking. With each confirmation I received that I had heard correctly I challenged the idea even more. I had grown accustomed to the lifestyle that my job had allowed me to lead. I never had to tell myself no if I wanted something. When I finally said OK give me peace and I'll take the step--He did. A job that I loved I was suddenly filled with contempt for. When I thought about the money part of the decision, again I was accustomed to my lifestyle, I was almost instantly filled with peace. The words that gave me the peace that quieted my fears? "You were born in this earth to be the righteousness of God. My word says 'I have never seen the righteous forsaken or his seed out begging for bread.'" I know now that the reason I had to leave the job I once loved wasn't only because God was calling me, but because it was becoming something that I could have ended up worshipping and serving. I also know now that the more I stayed at that job the closer I was to bringing my life to an early end. I was literally working myself to death. It wasn't until I stopped working that my body was able to tell me just how ill I truly was. It had been living off of ambition and stress. When those two components were gone it was like the tape coming off a broken window pane. A little more than a year and a half of not working and just studying the word of God, and I am still learning my call and my direction I am to follow. I bless God because of His faithfulness, Love and provision. I love him and am truly indebted to Him for His life changing nature. My way to pay off this debt I feel towards Him? Offering my life to Him to with as He pleases. Two years ago I would have said I was nuts. Today I am OK with that. Even more than OK--I am excited. No income coming in right now. But that is OK too. I can honestly say that I have not missed anything. He has truly changed my priorities. The most awesome part about that for me is that the less I have, the more that I have been able to give--and give with faith knowing that my Father is going to take care of me. I know there isn't a need (past, present or future) that my father doesn't know about and that He won't be faithful to provide for. It is amazing to me to think that even if I don't have money or things to give, I will still be able to give something amazing away. Peter taught me that. Acts 3:6 was my lesson: "But Peter said, 'I don’t have any silver or gold for you. But I’ll give you what I have. In the name of Jesus Christ the Nazarene, get up and walk!'” I love the verse in The Message too: "Peter said, "I don't have a nickel to my name, but what I do have, I give you: In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk!" He grabbed him by the right hand and pulled him up. In an instant his feet and ankles became firm. He jumped to his feet and walked." I don't know why I am writing this today...Maybe for you or maybe it is just a message to myself that I need to read when I get it in my email today. If the second option is the reason then pay attention Mike and keep this message near the top of your email so you can reference it when you need to remind yourself that God is faithful, you are more blessed than you ever thought was possible, you are happier than you ever thought was possible, and of course, you are OK.

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!
Mike

Ignored and Overlooked

Ignored and overlooked. As a kid on the playground none of us wanted to be the last kid picked for the team. None of us wanted to be passed over or passed by. We wanted to be a part of the action that was going on around us. We wanted to be a part of the group--to have something to belong to. We had a need for association. As we have grown up, has this need changed or diminished? Maybe to a degree it has, as we are more selective of the groups that we look to associate ourselves with. Thinking in terms of society, I still can't imagine one of us that wants to belong to a group that either of those two labels applies to. Overlooked for a promotion because of our gender. No that's not good. Ignored in political realms because we don't have a high voter turnout percentage. That's not a good feeling either. How about ignored because we are in prison for committing crime or worse yet crimes. What if I was in prison because I committed the same crime over and over and over and got caught each time--should I be ignored or overlooked? I don't have a job right now because I am sick. What if my life was reduced to holding a sign on the corner because I have exhausted all my other means of support? Would you ignore me because it was my fault? Ignore me because you have your own problems? Overlook me because I am overweight so I must be eating somewhere? One of the things I have heard most from people who have AIDS is that the thing they miss most is being touched. Would you let someone who is sick with AIDS die without being hugged simply because their disease carries a stigma just as big as its death sentence? Overlook them because of what they did to contract the disease? Pretty tough questions. These are roaring through my mind right now. Especially now. I don't have a job. I am not made of nor was I born into money. Yet I have so much more than I need. I have the luxury of deciding what, when and where I will eat. I hear God calling again. I know He is going to move again in my life soon. I feel it.

Matthew 25:37-40 (The Message)"Then those 'sheep' are going to say, 'Master, what are you talking about? When did we ever see you hungry and feed you, thirsty and give you a drink? And when did we ever see you sick or in prison and come to you?' Then the King will say, 'I'm telling the solemn truth: Whenever you did one of these things to someone overlooked or ignored, that was me—you did it to me.'

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!
Mike

Can You Hear ME Now?!?

This has been an interesting week for me in terms of what God has been teaching me and asking me to do. It is amazing what will happen when you get so frustrated with waiting and you open your mouth to say,, "God whatever it is you want me to do just tell me and I will do it!" Amazing because it brings to life that age old adage about being careful what you wish for, because you just might get it. When you open you mouth like that, it seems that is when God chooses to speak back to you and it is not always what you want to hear. It is almost as if He waits until you are so broke down and there is almost nothing left of you to get in your way and then He moves you. After reading that back to myself, I guess that is a pretty smart plan after all. I mean why use somebody when they are not broke down and there is too much of themselves to get in the way of His plan.

God is calling me in a new direction. It is kind of weird though because it seems like He never really used me in the old direction I felt Him calling me in. It was almost if He was testing me to see if I would or even could hear what He was asking me to do. It must be great to be God. (I will leave that one alone. No need for Lucifer being kicked out of heaven Part II.) In this new direction I am excited and a little intimidated at the same time. I guess that is good because I am excited enough to want to take on the challenge that intimidates me. The funny part of all this was how God had to tell me. He took me into 2 different places in scripture dealing with my new calling. Then a book I received in the mail was all about stepping out and accepting the call that God has placed on our lives. And I guess I was still saying "God are you sure?!?" I picked up a book that I could never get into when it was given to me 2 years ago because I needed something to get me through a 2 hour doctor appointment my mom had. God stepped in again and used this book to speak to me as it dealt with finding and doing what God made you to do for His glory.

I might be a little hard of hearing, but I finally heard Him. And together we will press on.

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!

Mike

The Purpose

I am reading through 1 Timothy today. I have a lot of questions that have been going through my mind lately and it seems that God is answering them one by one. This morning these words popped of the page at me: "The purpose of my instruction is that all the Christians there would be filled with a love that comes from a pure heart, a clear conscience, and a sincere faith." (1Timothy 1:5 NLT) This spoke volumes to my spirit. It confirmed in me a need to preach and teach discipleship. My heart hurts for the people that are saved and then allowed to fall by the wayside and fend for themselves in terms of spiritual development. I know that each person that comes to meet my savior is called to a specific purpose in His kingdom and they need some guidance and help find out exactly what that is. Sometimes people get so concerned with increasing the number on the souls-saved-board, that they allow these new converts to get lost in the new life they have just taken on. Our goal should be to help these new brothers and sisters in Christ "be filled with a love that comes from a pure heart, a clear conscience, and a sincere faith."

Father let me help advance Your kingdom with a pure heart, a clear conscience and a sincere faith in you.

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!
Mike

Put In My Place--Biblical Style

17You have wearied the LORD with your words.“Wearied him?” you ask. “How have we wearied him?”You have wearied him by suggesting that the LORD favors evildoers since he does not punish them. You have wearied him by asking, “Where is the God of justice?”

I know we all have done it. We see the horrible things happening in the world around us and we wonder where God is. We wonder why He hasn't stopped those bad things from happening to the innocent people--the good people. I know I do. I often wonder where the justice is when I see people get away with horrible crimes and actions. That bothers me. Well actually it frustrates me. It seems sometimes like the evil in the world prospers more than the good does. I was thinking about this hard the other day and this was the verse that God led me to. It would seem that I am not the only one who gets frustrated and tired of seeing what I see, but God also gets tired of people questioning His ability to be sovereign and to the only Judge. Reading that the first time put me in my place. reading it the second time made me officially whooped and repentant. God is God and God alone. He is sovereign over all things to do with them as He wills when He wills. 'Nuff said!

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!
Mike

The 100th Post...MOVE!

It has been kind of rough for me lately emotionally and physically both. If I let it, I think depression could have gotten the best of me these past few days. It is hard sometimes to know you are following God's will for your life and sometimes not see the rewards for the work you are doing. It is hard sometimes to not be as active as you want to be and to feel like you are always in the holding pattern waiting to take off. As I was venting this morning to God, He reminded me of the first sermon that I ever preached.

Gen 13:14-18
"14After Lot was gone, the LORD said to Abram, “Look as far as you can see in every direction. 15I am going to give all this land to you and your offspring as a permanent possession. 16And I am going to give you so many descendants that, like dust, they cannot be counted! 17Take a walk in every direction and explore the new possessions I am giving you.” 18Then Abram moved..."

God has given me promises for my life. He has told me specifically what I will be doing. And turn by turn I have followed His directions. Sometimes though when things don't quite seem to be happening fast enough for me, I start to get stagnate and the waiting gets the best of me. I imagine the promises that He gave to Abraham were a little hard to believe at first as well. But God told Abraham to look as far as he could see in every direction and what he saw would be His. In one version Abraham is told to walk the length and breadth of his land. He is basically told to inspect it, to get to know it, to claim it. Abraham could have just waited till all of this was accomplished before he did anything about it. He could have waited to see if would come to pass before he put any effort into it. But he didn't do any of these things. the first part of verse 18 says that "Abram Moved..." He received his direction from God and he took action to receive the gift God had laid in front of him.

I think so many of us sit and hold on to promises God has given us when we should be out there moving. We should be inspecting, claiming and owning the gifts that He has placed in us. We need to walk the length and width of the promise God has given to us and claim ownership of the talents that He desires to use for His kingdom. When it is so easy to sit and wait, wondering where God is and when He is going to use us or move through us, I think we should consider the possibility that He is waiting for us to move. He is waiting for us to take ownership of what He has given to us.

There is a lot of opportunity in the kingdom of God to move. If you don't know your gift or calling or purpose in the Kingdom of God, still move. Move in prayer. Move in encouragement. Move in helps. Move in sharing the word of God. Move. Move. Move!

Habakkuk Is Still Speaking

This past week I have been reading through the minor prophets. I have gone back through some of my notes and one thing that is sticking out is in the book of Habakkuk.

Habakkuk 2:2 "Then the Lord said to me, 'write my answer in large, clear letters on a tablet, so that a runner can read it and tell everyone else.'"

I try to write things down if I think I am going to have the tendency to forget them. When I am going through some rough times I am not going to be sharp enough to remember all the good things that God has promised me. The first things that come into my head are not going to be all the reasons why these hard times will not last forever. I am sorry to admit that, but it is true. That is why I am sure that God had Habakkuk write down what He was going to say. When God promises restoration or judgement we need to remember that something has to be gone through to have the need to be restored. There is always an outcome or an end to a situation and for those of us who believe in the grace and goodness of God, we know it will always be for our betterment, He always has our best interest in His interest. I am going to start a promise book. Where I fill it with the promises of God, spoken through the bible or from those who speak encouragement into my life. When the rough times comes, it will help me focus and have faith in the outcome and maybe make it a little easier to walk through, knowing the ending.

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!
Mike

A Reminder to Love

This email was sent to me by a friend. It is absolutely a prayer that reminds us to think more like God and see situations and people through His eyes and with His love. I truly believe we come across people and situations in our lives solely for the purpose of adding them to our prayer list or at the very least to pray for them at that moment. I pray that as you read through this, you will be able to identify with it and it will touch you as it did me.

Heavenly Father, Help us remember that the jerk who cut us off in traffic last night is a single mother who worked nine hours that day and is rushing home to cook dinner, help with homework, do the laundry and spend a few precious moments with her children.

Help us to remember that the pierced, tattooed, disinterested young man who can't make change correctly is a worried 19-year-old college student, balancing his apprehension over final exams with his fear of not getting his student loans for next semester.

Remind us, Lord, that the scary looking bum, begging for money in the same spot every day (who really ought to get a job!) is a slave to addictions that we can only imagine in our worst nightmares.

Help us to remember that the old couple walking annoyingly slow through the store aisles and blocking our shopping progress are savoring this moment, knowing that, based on the biopsy report she got back last week, this will be the last year that they go shopping together Heavenly

Father, remind us each day that, of all the gifts you give us, the greatest gift is love. It is not enough to share that love with just those we hold dear. Open our hearts not to just those who are close to us, but to all humanity. Let us be slow to judge and quick to forgive, show patience, empathy and love. Amen.

I am not big on "pass it on" letters, but in this case how can we afford not to remind people to love everyone, not just those we want to? If you send this to 5 people, then you have a chance to touch 5 people. Working for God on earth doesn't pay much......butHis retirement plan is out of this world

Be blessed and Be a blessing!!
Mike Aguilar
Empty Vessel Ministries

“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled.” (Matthew 5:6)

My Boy Habakkuk

I opened the book of Habakkuk last night because I had been feeling the urge to read it. I mean a name like Habakkuk as the title of the book it must be God right? It most absolutely was God! It ministered to me in what I am going through this season in my life. I will write more later but what has touched me the most is this:

2:14 For the time will come when all the earth will be filled, as the waters fill the sea, with an awareness of the glory of the Lord.

That is so amazing to me. That verse just echoed in my spirit all night last night. So prophetic.

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!
Mike

Not the Best of Summers

This summer has not been the easiest in terms of heat. We have gone through a heat wave the last week that has kicked my butt. To top it off the motor in the air conditioner broke and so we have been using fans to circulate the hot air in our rooms. But just when we thought that was the worst to could get, the power went out yesterday. We sat in the living room, the coolest room in the house, with all the windows open, just staring at the fan hoping that power would be restored to it soon. It felt like that Arnold Schwarzenegger movie Total Recall where the aliens watch their air supply fan stop moving and they just sit there and stare at it. I would have left the house but I just gotten back from hanging out at Starbucks for a couple of hours and I felt bad for the rest of the family. So we just stuck it out together. I will say though I had to charge my cell phone to be able to use it for an alarm this morning so I was fortunate enough to have to charge it in my car where there was air conditioning. In my car I realized just how peaceful the world is without distraction like noise and just how beautiful the world can be when we allow it to only be seen through the light of nature without all the extra glare of the city lights.

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!
Mike

Powerful Video Post

I saw this video last night and it was awesome. It is amazing how the arts can be used to minister to people on a completely different level. This is amazing! I hope it ministers to you as much as it did me!

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!

Mike

A Walk to Remember

Tonight I took a walk. This may not seem like a big deal to most folks, but I have a hard time walking and use a cane to help balance myself. Tonight's walk was something of an eye opener for me. I realize just how great is. I live in a great neighborhood, that is partially undeveloped so I was able to enjoy a lot of nature tonight. The sky, the stars, the sounds--it was just beautiful. It made me almost sad because I do live in such a good neighborhood. I realized that I am part of the fortunate few--not everyone gets to enjoy the luxury of walking around their neighborhood alone at night. Even if they did, very few have the time to walk around their neighborhood just for the sake of taking a walk. You never know what you take for granted until you almost can't do it anymore. Sometimes we just need to slow down in our lives and see the things we miss when we are going full speed ahead.

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!
Mike

Random Starbucks Thought...

I have been sitting here in Starbucks since about 5:10 this morning. I dropped my mom off at dialysis and will go pick her up in about 3 hours. As I sit here I am just thinking how good God is. It is amazing how much He loves us and How much mercy He has extended to us. If we allow Him to He will speak to us all day long if only we can be quiet enough to listen. He turns even the plainest events in my daily routine into lessons for me. He truly meets me exactly where I am at each day. He is amazing!

Be Blessesd and Be a Blessing!
Mike

I Exist...

About a week or so ago I wrote a post about needing sometimes to know that I exist. We are surrounding by all kinds of things in our world that can make us seem insignificant. I just needed to know that I was was leaving my impression on this world. How amazing is it that yesterday in the mail I received this:

All I can say is wow and thank you. I know I exist.

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!

Mike

Leaving My Footprint

I am filling out my 501c3 paperwork right now. Over the past couple of weeks I have been doing some vision casting and most of my free time has been spent thinking about how I can make the biggest footprint possible in the lives of people that need to be reached. I have been looking far off into the future thinking of ways to be able to do this. It hit me really hard today that I have been taking the wrong approach. The wrong approach in a couple of ways. First off by spending so much time thinking about the future I was letting the present slip by me unaffected and unchanged. I was working on plans for a time that may not ever come and allowing the time that I had been blessed to be able to see get away from me without making a difference in it while it was here. In thinking about the future I had taken the goals and sense of urgency that God has placed in me and run way ahead of Him. He gave me the calling to move in it now and not think of how it can be used later on a broader scale. My part of the vision casting process with God is to follow directions; it is to follow the vision in the direction that it was cast and not to offer suggestions on how it to be cast or where it should be cast. My calling from Christ is to be obedient and to move when I am empowered and not before. I think God's people would be better suited concentrating on obedience than on some of the other things that has taken God and the vision He has given us and pushed them off to the side. Consider me spanked ;)

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing!
Mike

One of These Days

One of these days… This statement is usually followed by something that we wished would happen in the future. Or it is usually followed by something that we have always wanted or needed to do but do not have the time or the resources to get it accomplished. I heard this song today for the first time. I have listened to it on the radio several times before but today is the first day that I actually heard it. One of these days is an awesome statement that can bring about excitement and the thrill of anticipation if it is applied to something positive or dare I say amazing. Just think about it Christ is going to return for us one of these days! I put some thought into this for a few minutes and thought of things that one of these days could be used in a positive connotation to bring out the excitement in me.

One of these days…
My Savior is going to come back for me, If I don’t get to heaven before then.
All the trials I am going through right now are going to turn into victories.
All the promises that God has spoken over my family and I are going to be fulfilled.
This body I am living in is going to be healed just like the bible says it is.
I am going to see my reflection in the mirror and see myself as being made in God’s image.
I am not going to worry about stigma or stereotypes; the only banner I will wear is Love.
One of these days… powerful words after all.

Be Blessed and Be Blessing!
Mike